Before Anything

Before anything
I do
I do these
push-ups,
I give them,
there’s more than a hundred
of them,
I give
to my back
so there’s no pain,
each one
is like writing a poem
each one
like eating something
that’s not always pleasant
every day
that will keep you alive,

in a silent construction
built between me
and the floor,
moving up and down
the poverty of my desire
hunts down a reward
in flesh
deciding
I want you
purring,
purring into my chest,
your tongue in my eye, your
heels
stabbing the ceiling.